Three stupid years, one amazing year

My psych brought up a previous time I’d been on a specific medication, and it was over two years ago. That means I started my Journey Through the World of Psychiatry, Woo-freakin-hoo about three years ago. And I still haven’t found something that works for me.

My diagnosis has changed so much it’s ridiculous. Started out as social anxiety, got that taken care of, then general anxiety popped up. That’s something I’m still fighting with, but now I have the words depression and bipolar hanging over my head. This isn’t what I expected at all when I started going down this road. I expected to just get stuff for anxiety, talk to a counselor every once in a while, and be done with it. If only it were that easy.

I’m going from an SSRI to an SNRI (NO MORE SERTRALINE YAY), and I’m hoping it ends up working out. We’ll see.

In any case, I’m writing too much about myself and not enough about Arya so…

She’s getting better at standing. It’s hard work, I can tell. She doesn’t really seem to want to stand much but it’s okay. She’s interested in moving (scoot scoot scoot), so that’s enough for the moment. If she’s not walking by… I think 18 months? then we’ll get her checked for that, too. The therapist is still visiting once a week, though, and we’ve completely changed focus from crawling to pulling herself into a squatting/kneeling position. It’s funny, because Arya always seems to show off when the therapist is here. When we’re alone? Psh, I can’t get her on her knees for anything. She screams. And screams and screams.

But I know she can do it, so I’m not worried. That’s what I keep telling myself.

I still can’t believe that she’s turning one in a week and a half or so. Has it really been one year? I refuse to believe it. She still looks so much like a baby, my little baby, but I guess that’s because she still is, huh? She doesn’t have the ankle chub I’ve seen a lot of babies her age have. Her legs are chubby, but they’re still dainty. Arya is petite, which I think makes her look younger, but that’s okay. She’s going to be one year old regardless and I can’t believe it. At least she’s making it into her second year of life with two (!) teeth, not just one! Ha ha ha…

We’re having her party at a park and I can’t wait. I’ll be making cupcakes for everyone and a big cupcake for her. I promise there will be a ton of pictures.


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