Arya’s hair curled up just right the other day. I’m really sad the pictures came out so terrible, but at least you can kind of see it.

I’ve finally been scrapping pages from August of last year when she was a month old and it’s staggering. She’s changed so much. I mean, obviously, considering it’s been a year and she’s a baby, but it still just blows me away. I mean, we’re brushing her teeth twice a day now. She has teeth! One on the top and three on the bottom. (Not that many at 13 months, but still.)

She still doesn’t crawl, though, which is something that continues to worry me despite the PT’s insistence that she’s doing so good. Seeing babies that are much smaller than Arya at storytime crawl, roll, and sit up is hard. She still can’t do those things at a year. She can’t sit up from a prone position, can’t get on her knees, can’t even get into a crawling position when she’s laying on her tummy.

And I keep wondering if it’s my fault. Did I not do enough with her as she was growing up? Instead of taking cute pictures back last year in August, should I have been doing more to teach her how to move? Did I feed her enough? All these questions are continually racing through my head and I don’t have any answers. All I can really do is continue to do the PT exercises with her and hope that one day, she doesn’t scream and cry when we try to help her do things.

Things she should’ve been doing 6 months ago. I just can’t get past that.


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